From the mouths of babes

  I love thinking of all the sweet things the brothers and cousins of Abush have said.

His cousin Luke, after being told we were adopting a child from Africa:  Luke studied the skin on his own arm.  He then looked up at us, a bit baffled and confirms, "But....the Jackson family has white skin...."

His big brother Ryan:  Ryan ran into get me one day out of the blue and drags me down the hallway to a closed bedroom door.  "Momma, when my brother gets here I'm going to open the door like this and say 'It's all yours.'"

His future partner in crime, 3 year old cousin Leah:  Leah has given Abush the name that has stuck.  She has named him "Uppie Uppie" in an attempt to say Ethiopia. We love this name and refer to him that way the majority of the time.

His big cousin, 5 year old Nate:  "Aunt Chrissi, are you gonna go get your step-son today?"

His big bubba Travie:  We had been invited to go to Disney Land w/ our close friends, the Meisters.  Scott was wiped out and decided not to go.  Over dinner we were discussing if the boys and I were going to go w/out Scott.  After making the decision that we were going to stay home because "We didn't want Daddy to be lonely" Travis proudly declares, "I've got a great idea.  Me, you and Bubby can go to DisneyLand w/ Bill and Kelly while Daddy goes to get my baby brother in Africa.  Then he can stay home and play with him while we stay at DisneyLand."

The Long Ride

I've been warned often that going through international adoption is like being on a long roller coaster ride.  I suppose that all of my pregnancies were the same.  From the first tests coming back positive, to the nauseous feeling that confirmed there was in fact life inside my body.  On to the overwhelming exhaustion felt, the desire to do nothing but lie on the couch while my hubby took care of me.  Then there were the doctors appointments, nervously waiting to hear heartbeats and being so relieved when they came.  The miscarriage experience, loving a child w/ all I have, knowing that he or she is in Heaven and that we will be united one day.  Being put on bed rest and doing everything within my power to make sure my boy was healthy only to be born post-due date.  LABOR PAINS!!!!!!!  Yes, it was a roller coaster, totally worth it, something I would do over and over and over again because of the reward of being Mama that comes along with the ride.

Well, I actually love roller coasters, have since I was pretty young.  My dear cousins sparked the love once again this past summer as I found myself headed face down on Superman, having the time of my life....So, last week, I was at the height of our adoption roller coaster, having the hope that Abush might get to be home with us for Christmas.  I envisioned him on Christmas morning, listening to Scott read the story of the Savior's birth to him for the first time, clapping along as we sang happy birthday to Jesus, being happily overwhelmed as he found wrapped gifts under the tree....all for him, playing with cousins and brothers whom he would never have to officially say goodbye to.  Yes, I was at the top, my favorite place to be, little did I know, an unexpected loop was around an invisible corner and would soon turn my stomach into shambles.

Our papers were sent to DC today, a huge step in the process so I confirmed w/ the agency that everything was ready to go.  I then got the news that it would probably be 3-4 months before we would get to travel to Ethiopia to bring Abush home.  It didn't matter how I tried to twist up a calendar in my mind...we're looking at February at the earliest.  I have to say, that peace that the Lord promises, the one that transcends understanding, it covered me.  To Him be the glory!  Don't get me wrong, I am so sad that my boy has to stay in his orphanage any longer than necessary.  We are here, we are able, we are ready, we want to take care of Abush.  But here's what I know:  For whatever reason the Maker has, we have to wait a few more months.  His timing is perfect, His plan is perfect.  And I know full well that no one can take care of Abush better than his Creator.  So I sit and trust, a little nauseous and a lot sad.  I have a mommy heart and all it wants is to take care of my boy, for him to feel secure, full, cleaned and full of joy.  But the ride isn't over so on we go, waiting for the date and looking forward to meeting our boy.  One thing I know, if God wants to bump the date up, He can and will.  And yes, that's certainly what I'll be praying for.  Hoping for a smooth ride as the papers go through to the embassy this week.   

Almond Eyes

Abush's eyes remind his Aunt Laura of almonds.  I completely agree.  So many people have commented on those gorgeous eyes, how they just draw you in.  I look into his eyes each day, often, and think of what he must be going through at the time.  I trust in God's providence over his life and it brings me peace.  No one can take care of our boy like the Heavenly Father, so I must rest content knowing Abush is in His arms.  I still miss him tremendously and pray for a quick trip home.

Currently Abush is in Soddo at an orphanage a few hours away from Addis, the capitol of Ethiopia.  Our paperwork is in limbo, waiting to go to D.C.  We hope it comes soon and we will have a date for travel.  There is a possibility that we'll have him home for Christmas.  The best possible present ever for us!  The plan is for Daddy, Pa Jackson and Pa Austin to make the trip together. We'd appreciate prayer for the trip.  My dad recently had surgery on his shoulder.  The complete recovery is 6 months!!!!  He is a trooper and I don't think anything will keep him from this trip.  He has quickly become ambidextrous and I'm sure he will have plenty of strength in his right arm to carry his new grandson around. I'm going to stay home with the boys and pace the floors I'm sure.  I've told the girls they better keep me busy.  It's been over a week since we received pics of Abush.  It feels like we've known him for a lifetime.

In a way, it's a similar experience as when I saw Ryan or Travis for the first time on the ultra sound monitor.  I was in awe of what the Creator could fashion inside of my own body.   I was humbly brought to tears.  The same with my third boy, Abush Dana Jackson, only I stood in awe that our Creator had a completely different plan of fashioning him, still a completely perfect plan. We were forwarded his precious picture just two days ago and I cannot take my eyes off of him. I've been asked if it feels like he's my own yet.  Honestly, I have known he was my own since the Lord placed a boy from Ethiopia in mine and Scott's hearts, now I have a face and name so of course it makes it much more real.  Nothing brings to me more joy than being Mama.  How blessed I am to be Mama again.

Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. They are plans for good and not disaster.  Plans to give you a future and a hope."